Mom and Dad went out of town last weekend, so you know what that means… Pawty time! My brofurs, sisfurs, and I typically look forward to Saturdays (aka Caturdays) because Mom and Dad are expected to be home to serve us. However, sometimes they have “plans” away from home (as if something could possibly be more important than us). And they have the audacity to leave us.
This clearly unacceptable behavior has occurred far too often. This Saturday was the last straw. Therefore, the fur siblings and I decided it was time we took matters into our own paws. We decided to throw an epic house pawty!
I am very disappointed that I have to write this. There exists an unspoken, and yet clearly universally defined, set of cat rules that deserve attention. Any human who shares their home with a feline should be well aware of this. But, alas, it is not always so. Therefore, it is with exasperation that I have been compelled to assemble this list. Nevertheless, in the hopes that I may save at least one of my feline friends from unnecessary grief, I present to you the top 10 cat rules that all humans must obey.
Live each day to the fullest. Find joy in the simple things. And every other vapid cliche you can think of.
I suppose they’re true, though. Really, we all are built to adapt, to get acclimated to any situation. When I was tiny Mom used to keep me in the bathroom when she was gone to keep the canines from mistaking me for a squeaky toy (really, dogs?!). All I dreamed about was one day being free to roam the house. Now that I’ve reached that important milestone, I don’t even think about it anymore. It’s just life.
So that got my Pebbles brain working. What do I do every day, even in the little routines I take for granted, that brings me joy? And how can I even recognize it when it’s there? Well, I guess today’s post will be sort of a travelogue. Then this is it: a day in the life of Pebbles the Blind Cat.
As most of you probably know by now, my mom is a veterinarian. In case you’re not sure what that means, it means that she gets paid to insert objects of torture (and sometimes even fingers) into skin, muscle, ears, or (ahem) any orifice belonging to animal victims all while smiling and holding polite conversation with their humans. And please, oh please, don’t ask me how I know the details of what happens at the clinic.
I don’t fully understand the motivation behind it all, but she has been in this career for quite a while. And, fair warning, she does seem sensitive as to the longevity of her practice. Just the other day when I asked if she got to work on Noah’s animals she gave me a very dirty look. So, anyway, I figured since she’s been doing this for a few centuries, she must have some interesting stories to tell by now. So I decided to do an exclusive interview about some of the things that happen behind the scenes. Although I tried to keep this professional, I think Mom’s interview skills need a little polishing up.
So, listen up, guys. People complain. I mean, a lot. And, to be honest, I’ve even done it myself before. Maybe. Once. Ever. But let’s talk about this for a minute. Because, after all is said and done, what do most of us really have to complain about, anyway?
Okay, so don’t worry. This isn’t going to be one of those “it could be worse” speeches or “think about how bad things are for the dump-off animals.” No, I really just want to be rational and positive here. Seriously, let’s take a moment and be grateful while we fold some clothes together.